blogs

From my regular blog at http://www.plasticsnappythings.blogspot.com

Sometimes Baby J looks up at me and raises his arms wide, while smiling like a cherub on a Christmas card.

"Aww," I usually say, "do you want a huggy?" And then I wrap him in my arms and hug him tightly, thinking about how lucky I am to have him in my life. It's totally a Hallmark moment, despite the fact that he usually seems vaguely dissatisfied.

About that last part? Today I figured out why.

We were sitting on the floor on the hideous psychedelic ark mat when Baby J opened his arms, as per usual. I was momentarily busy, so it took me a second to respond, and in that second, I got to take a good look at him.

Which is when I realized that he wasn't reaching out his arms hoping for a hug at all.

He was holding them out to balance himself while he tried to stand up.

I watched mutely as he lifted himself a little ways up in the air, waving his arms slightly to keep from tipping over. One leg stuck out straight in front of him, and the other one bent at the knee and turned to the side, giving him some modicum of leverage. He rose probably a centimeter before plunking back down on his bottom and looking at me expectantly.

I stared at him.

"Wow," I managed, "you can almost stand up!"

I guess I shouldn't have been surprised -- for the last few days he has been mounting increasingly impatient attempts at lifting himself upright on anything stable enough to support his weight (and a few things that aren't) and he has wanted to stand (and jump!) since he was two months old.

Still, there was a part of me that was sort of sad he didn't just want to hug me tightly like a Christmas card child. I guess somewhere deep in me there's this belief that the still shot at the end of some 80s TV shows, where they're showing the audience that it all turned out okay after all, is an actual thing in life. It never occurs to me to wonder what happens after happily-ever-after-now-we-have-a-baby, but actually, kind of a lot does happen.

But I'm sure there's much more rejection to come, so I'm trying to appreciate the moment while I'm in it.